Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Today.

Today.

Today, I leave my best friend. Oh, how I've enjoyed visiting with her these past 2 days...

Today, I am stressed about my future. I look around and things aren't happening like I would like.

Today, my heart jumps at the thought of moving to Columbus. Away from my family, away from my friends, away from everything I've always known.

Today, I'm feeling bittersweet towards the future. Scared, nervous but excited and ready.

Today, I do not understand somethings in my life. But, am I supposed to understand everything?

Today, Facebook has gotten the better of me and essentially, I have "stalked" too much.

Today, I am realizing the "newness" that is about to overcome me. And, I'm scared.

Oh, today... Please be nice to me.

caitlyn.


Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Pseu-Pseu-Pseudo-Tumor.


Hello everyone.

So, I know alot is circulating out there about me and I just want to clarify. So, here is just whats going on...

If you don't know me too well, you didn't know that this past semester in school was the hardest for me. I was taking 24 semester hours, working 2 jobs and babysitting 3 days a week. I was stretched thinnnn. So, of course, all of my health problems I just gave up to stress and sleep deprivation. Looking back, I wish those would have been my only problems.

In April, I began to lose my vision. I was very very dizzy. I had ridiculous headaches. But, of course, I chocked up all up to stress.

Until the day I had my wreck....

Scariest experience of my life.

I wasn't sure if I had blacked out when it happened- I couldn't remember.

This is when my sweet mama began to worry...

Within the next few days, my health went from bad to worse. It was Easter weekend and I couldn't even go to church on Easter. So, Good Monday rolls around, and I am first one in the doctors office. He immediately sent me for an MRI and ran alot of tests on me.

As I look back on that day, I remember seeing the distress in my mama and daddy's faces as I was taken back. It was rough.

MRI=done.

Result=nothing. nada. nado. ziltch.

We were in a state of relief. Maybe the tests will reveal something? Hopefully.

I am sent home with a bag full of medicine and ordered to sleep.

The next few days after this are a blur of things...

Things really were not adding up and were not getting better so, my mother researched and researched until she found some answers.

She made me an appointment to see an Ophthalmologist who referred me to a Neurologist. She wouldn't tell me exactly what was going on, but she knew already what was wrong with me.

I was diagnosed on April 27, 2011 with a neurological disease called Pseudotumor Cerebri. Or, Benign Intercranial Hypertension. To explain, I have an excess of spinal fluid on/around my optic nerve(causing my loss of vision) putting pressure on the nerve and causing me all of these problems. My body thinks I have a brain tumor, but I really don't. Make sense?

To treat this, I am on several medicines to help the fluid to drain.

If the pressure doesn't improve and go down, I will sustain permanent vision loss.

I had an MRI on Monday, I saw an Ophthalmologist on Wednesday, I had a Spinal Tap on Thursday, thought I was dying on Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday.

The LP(lumbar puncture) was to confirm the diagnosis and also to relieve some of the pressure. And it was as terrible as it sounds. I really, honestly thought I was dying.

It has been about 2 months since the diagnosis, and my pressure has gone from the worst it can possibly be to better, but still not good. I am now facing surgery to prevent me from losing my vision. We will know at the end of July for sure if I need surgery.

Please, if you are a praying person, please pray for me.

And for those of you already praying for me, thank you, so much.

I have a long road ahead...


caitlynk.